I'm out

Wow, what a week I've had. So, it's been just over a week since my last post and, man, a lot has happened. I'll start at the beginning.

So, last Thursday, I went to a concert with a friend. Well, I thought we were just friends. The concert was great, it was in a church and there was a rummage sale in the basement where we laughed about choose your own adventure books. Good times were had. I had given her a ride, so, of course, I drove her home afterwards. So, we pull up in front of her building and we're sitting in my car talking about family and stuff, getting to know each other. It's kind of late, so she says she has to go. She's halfway out of the car, says :Actually, you know what," as I'm saying "What," she's turning around and suddenly she's kissing me! Wow! I did not see that coming. I mean, I did, eventually, but not then. She completely took me by surprise, which I kind of enjoy. I love people who can surprise me.

Anyway, we hung out both Saturday and Sunday night for a couple of hours each night, but haven't seen each other since then mainly because I've been sick and had to cancel on her. However, we're hanging out tomorrow, just the two of us. I'm anxious to see what happens.

That was pretty exciting in itself, but that's not all that has happened this week. I was in an insanely good mood at work on Friday. We're talking, whistling, can't stop smiling, customers can't bring me down kind of mood. It was weird, but in a great way. Everyone was asking what was going on, why was I in such a good mood. And I was kind of bursting to tell someone. So, I told a coworker/friend, after much questioning, that I would tell her what happened, but I wouldn't give any details. She agreed to that, so I told her someone had kissed me the night before. It wasn't what she expected, but she got to surprise me even more when she asked "So, was it a guy or a girl?" I blushed quite badly, laughed, and hurried back to work. That, of course, answered her question straight away. So, I unintentionally came out to her.

On Saturday night, I came out to my big brother. He was drunk, I was mostly sober, just enough alcohol to give me the courage to actually do it. He sometimes gets pretty depressed when he's been drinking and that's what happened Saturday night. He was pretty upset and, to take his mind off of it, I told him I was "kind of seeing someone" and told him who. He laughed, said he'd thought so for a couple of weeks already. I assured him that it didn't mean I would check out girls with him to which he replied "Yeah, you are; that's the best part of having a gay sister." Thanks, big brother. Then he told me he'd always be there for me in whatever capacity I needed and that I didn't have to worry about telling my family because it would never change their opinion of me. He's a pretty great brother, I think I'll keep him around a while.

Then there was Sunday. A close friend of mine was away for two weeks =, while she was away, another friend of mine texted her, telling her that I was going to confirm something when she got back. So, she came back, we went to brunch and before our food was served, she said "So what were you going to tell me?" I'm a shy person by nature, I blush very easily and can be quite bashful and modest. It was full-on at that moment. I'm talking red face, fidgeting, stuttering, staring at the floor and toeing the ground shy/embarrassed. It took me a good couple of minutes to finally force out "I'm a bit more into girls than guys." I'm 26, not 14 and that's the best I can come up with. I knew the conversation was coming, but I'd been hoping there would be booze present. After I told her, she asked if I was attracted only to girls and I answered as best I could, basically saying I wasn't sure one way or the other and then we continued off into regular conversation, complaining about work and catching up.

So, in the last week, I have been kissed by a girl and I have told three people that I'm gay. It was the most eventful May long weekend I've had in a couple of years. No wonder I've been sick all week, what with that stress.